There’s a new GrubHub ad in my subway stop:

In case you can’t quite make it out, the freakishly anthropomorphic hot dog is offering a flower to the similarly grotesque female bun. (We know she’s gynecomorphous due to the employment of a convention tried and true since the time of Ms. Pac-Man: she’s wearing a bow.) And this ladylike imminent flower recipient bread product is meanwhile thinking: “Hope he brought condiments, too.” Beneath all of which is written, “You’ll Want to Do It Again & Again.”

Jack, Mike, you’re killing me. Deciphering the safely-assumed sexual content of your ads is fun only so long as said sexual content is buried—buried exquisitely deeply. (I’ll trust that you know what I mean.)

GOOD:

(See my original post on this subject for a close reading of this advertisement.)

ALSO GOOD:

(Again, see that original post for why.)

BAD:

I just hate when there’s nothing left for me to do!

Meanwhile, in other GrubHub-related news, I finally tracked down a copy of of the “something spicy” ad that I mentioned in that first post:

This one isn’t the worst, although it’s much too overt for my tastes. As I pointed out before:

The cute touch in this one is that she’s blocking her chest with a laptop, which has a pear in lieu of an apple. Which is a bit of a loss, in terms of straight sexual symbolism, even though it does raise the question of what pears represent, and what they cost you.

I suppose it’s also worth observing that they’re (presumably) both naked. Which is plausible; some couples get into bed naked and then do some work when they know they’re later going to, ahem, order takeout. But I prefer the reading that this is a pre-Fall scenario: our Adam and Eve are not disrobed, but have yet to robe in the first place, since they persist in an Edenic Bliss and know not yet of their nakedness. (However, how she can use a laptop without conscious worldly knowledge remains a difficult point. Perhaps we’re glimpsing them perched right upon the precipice of sin? Which would have dire implications for GrubHub’s patrons. Unless they’re into sin. And who isn’t these days?)

In conclusion, in the immortal words of Little Murders‘s Lt. Practice: “Come on! Will you shape up?“